How to Turn Your Girlfriend into a Nerd in Seven Easy Steps

Step 1: Obtain a non-nerd girlfriend

Okay, so this isn’t fair, and not just because we’re expecting a nerd to find a girlfriend. Everyone, after all, is a nerd about something. You can be a nerd about car parts or The Bachelor or baseball statistics or whatever you like; if you know more about something than the average person should and relish that fact, you’re a nerd. But I’m talking about nerds in the traditional, sci-fi sense, so let’s go with that.

Step 2: Take her to that Star Trek movie that came out in 2009

Well, first you’ll need to win free passes to an advance screening, then make sure your best friend, with whom you’ve been planning to see the movie since rumors of it surfaced several years before, is busy that night. Drag along your girlfriend, even though she thinks the Mall of America is the worst place in Minnesota and she’s a little bit skeptical about the movie itself because it’s Star Trek and there’s a whole culture around it and she won’t have any idea what’s going on.

Then (and this is important), make sure the movie is completely badassedly awesome and filled with sexy men having sexy space adventures. She will have no choice but to love it and see it two more times with you, once in IMAX.

Step 3: Have her get laid off from her job

This crucial step will give her a lot of spare time but very little money for entertainment.

Step 4: Lend her Your Star Trek: The Next Generation DVDs

You’re already a nerd, so you should have the box set on hand, though the discs will all be removed from the boxes and placed in a protective DVD wallet. You don’t want those boxes getting dented.

She’ll be reluctant at first, but with nothing else to do, she will agree to watch the first few seasons. After all, you haven’t been dating all that long, and hey, you should give the things your significant other is into a chance. Soon enough, she’ll have favorite episodes and characters and will giggle for days after Worf tells Keiko O’Brien “You may now give birth” and get upset that time everyone thought Worf was dead but he really wasn’t because he had an extra nervous system.

Step 6: Convince her to watch Battlestar Galactica by telling her it’s a bunch of sexy men having sexy space adventures

You will have learned sexy men are a draw for her during step two. If you need help convincing her, use that picture of Lee Adama holding a towel over his junk as evidence.

Step 7: Introduce her to Serenity

Okay, let’s face it. You’ve won. Celebrate your victory.

Photo by chıcgeeĸ

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